A Childhood Hero

Most boys of my generation, who are now adults, had their set of heroes when they were a young lad. Among these heroes may had been Superman, Batman, Spider-man, their Father, Uncle or hell one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. But most boys of my generation could agree on one man as a hero, he was American, strong and everything we thought we wanted to be. This man was Hulk Hogan – and even to this day he could still probably take me down in a one on one match – but the point of this post is not to discuss my childhood hero, but to discuss someone who received an opportunity that I could have only dreamed of as a young boy – and threw it away.

I am not big on television, there are a few shows here and there that I like and I can hardly dedicate more than an hour to the tube but one day I did happen to catch an episode of “Hogan Knows Best”. And on this very episode a friend/boyfriend of Brooke Hogan’s comes down to help her work on her “music” – well of course Hulk isn’t all about some random teenage boy in his house around his teenage daughter so he decides he wanted to spend time with the boy. Of course this, what we will call “mansy”, tells Brooke he’d rather not hang out with Hulk and precedes to complain about it.

Well the time comes when he has to and he is made to work out with the Hulk, watch television with him and then shoot automatic weapons with him. And after all of this is over he goes back to his complaining that he had to do it… wait… this dude got to hang out with Hulk Hogan – watch television with him, weight lift with him and shot automatic weapons with him? I’d kill for that!? Those are three masculine bonding rituals that male friends partake in and this kid is stating he doesn’t want to do it? What? Oh yeah and as if he needed to prove his stupidity or inability to take in his situation properly he thought that the fight from Rocky III was an actual wrestling match – both equally fake – but there is a difference, even a moron can tell a movie from wrestling.

But I digress – my point is that this kid didn’t deserve to hang out with Hulk Hogan and had no idea the honor that was bestowed upon him. I would gladly hang out with Hulkamania, his daughter is a lovely young lady but I am not interested – I would’ve just been more than happy to hang out with Hulk Hogan – a childhood hero.